thoughts in general.

Maybe I am crazy, maybe you drive me crazy, but truthfully we are all crazy, we are all abnormal, we are all created to be different. Yes, we share some of the same trait and survival habits, but all in all the way we think and act is 100% our own.Don't try to hurt my feelings by calling me "crazy", I strive to be nothing, but crazy. I am insane, erotic, unique, fabulous, creative, sassy, and classy. Don't use your cute vocabulary to try to play me off as anything, but those things. All your people know me, all my people know me, they know. I treat you right, I go above and beyond, okay so I over react, but at least I react, I care enough to be true to how I feel to you. I am open with you, would you want it any other way. If you don't like something you make it completely wrong, but have you ever stopped to maybe put everything together and realize you are stubborn.You are a wall, but think of all your wrong doing too, and all I have said and done with what I heard. Know that you have something great, hold onto it.

If you want to be with me, you must redeem yourself and watch your every action. This time is very critical, you are suppose to be proving yourself. Make no mistakes, I am not no fool. If you want forever then prove it, dont ignore one thing that I send, because when I finally do stop you will hope and maybe even pray for me to return.

just saying.

Why is it I find it so hard to express my true feelings? I get so mad and find it close to explain without sounding insane. I don't get myself sometimes, yet I expect you to understand my every thought. Regardless of everything I am still scared, afraid to take that step. Time must go bye, actions must be shown. Is that selfish of me? Who knows. I want my thoughts and feelings to be accepted, I dont want to be that girl you call "crazy".
Random rants, awesome.

Love&Hate

Love.Peace.Happiness.Violence.Hatred.Regret.

These are what we live by everyday. Lately I have learned that I only hate those I love, regret things that hurt the ones I love. Am violent for the ones I love. Love the ones I love, and live for them. And am happy with the ones I love and for them. Love over powers everything, Love is magic, it is power, it is key.

What a week.

Life is pretty ridiculous. My life seems to jump from one extreme to the next, at least there is never a dull moment I suppose. Sometimes I confuse my dreams with my reality. It is interesting how I cant tell the difference and find myself asking people if some of the events I had imagined were true. I hope that happens to other people and that I am not alone on that one. This week was an adventurous one, I found myself reconciling with the past and learning new things about myself and what I want. I hope this time things take a different route. Considering my lifes journey always likes to go the confusing way. Well whether my random mind thoughts make sense to you or not all I can say is I have learned a lot and am ready to move on with my life in a new direction.
meow.

Any ideas?

College, eh love it/hate it who knows. I love certain parts of school, learning new facts, and meeting new people, all that ruins it is mid-terms and finals. Okay well that's just the reality of school. My dilemma is that I am at the point in my education where I really have to find what I am passionate about and what I want to do with my life, but at this point in my life I am unsure about pretty much everything. The last thing I should be doing is planning out my life long career, I mean I barely know what insane thing I am going to do tomorrow. For example last week I was convinced I wanted to be a CSI agent,seriously I am a toothpick, so obviously that wouldn't have been a very good career choice. This week I want to be a pastry chef and for all I know next week I may want to join the circus.My point is I am unsure of everything which is normal for any twenty year old, but at this point I have been going through a change, I guess that's how you could put it. I just have been into trying new things, and expanding my horizon. Why hold back from experiencing life. I have nothing to lose, but regretting not seeing the world and meeting as many people as I can. I want to do everything something as simple as going to an opera, to something as extreme as sky diving. Why not, we only live once why not be WILD? Well anyways if anyone has any ideas of what I could possibly do with my life, please let me know. <3

Oh my dear (written for art & society)

I once met love it was magical

But once it ended it turned out to be tragical.

Oh my love, Oh my love

Oh how my love became a lie

He came and went as time flew by.

Oh my love, Oh my love.

Once I met my love I felt incredible

When I lost my love I felt regrettable.

Oh my love, Oh my love.

Now I am invincible

Because my love was so convincible.

Oh my love, Oh my love.

Frankly now my love I just don’t give a damn

Because my love took all my precious memories and crushed them like a ram.

Oh my love, Oh my love.

Our love has become a fire pit

There is no getting over it.

Oh my love, Oh my love.

Oh my dear this is the end of all of it.

Letting go

Sometimes you have to learn to just move on and forget know matter how hard it is. There are some people that will forever stay in your memory, while others don't have the same impact on your life. Every person that has became my close friend at one point has made some significant difference in my life and has changed me in some way, I thank them for this. I have learned  life lessons and have become a stronger person. I am not saying that I was  innocent as to why they became my past, but sometimes it is for the best. There are some mistakes, whether it was yours or their fault, that an "I'm sorry" just can't fix, know matter how much the person tried. This isn't just related to "boyfriends", but too friendships as well. Any relationship is hard and sometimes you just have to say "goodbye." This doesn't mean you are forgotten or not cared about, it means that you cared enough to know when it was time to just let go. That is one of the hardest things someone can do, but hey life goes on and just remember your friends and family are your number one support. <3

Alaska Please

Alaska has always been a place that I have wanted to visit for the past two years now. I want to go on a cruise and see the true beauty and mystery on the water. I want to see wildlife and go whale watching. I know it's probably not your ideal vacation spot considering the cold and this past winter we just had, but I do not care. I want to go this summer with one of my best friends, I want to be independent and just enjoy the true and natural beauty that the world has to offer us. If I meet a nice Eskimo on the way, I will not complain. I would also like to go dog sledding, so we will see if I can finally make my Alaska adventure a reality. This is my summer plan.

"Fuck you"

"Fuck You" by Cee Lo Green is officially my favorite song. After an exciting Saturday night with my dearest cousin Christie, we both realized that this song makes us happy. Of course we both just got out of serious relationships that turned sour and the guys immediately started their rebounding stage. Well all I have to say is, their loss or FUCK YOU and FUCK HER TOO. But on a more mature note I wish you all well and as for me and my cousin, we are taking our past experiences and the time we have now to find ourselves which will later on be taken into consideration with our next relationships. As the song goes, "If I were special I would still be with you." So we will go out and find our men who makes us feel special.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc0mxOXbWIU&feature=player_embedded

The little girl in me

So some of my friends call me Mel-stuffed-animal due to the fact that I am obsessed with stuffed animals. No I am not like a little kid and have them in every surface of my room. I do however always have a new random animal and my friends always make fun of me. Like the giant zebra I recieved for my 20th birthday. Yes I know I am unique. I love unique things and obnoxious things. Why not?

Random

The big V-Day, who needs love.

Hello cyber space. I am new to this whole "blogging" thing, but of course out of all the days of the year to start I pick Valentines day. Yes, this year I am one of those angry single chicks. Okay so I am not angry, but it brings out the not so happy side of me. Recently single makes a not so happy Melissa. Anyway my friends have made this crappy holiday a whole hell of a lot better. Red velvet cake, dinner, flowers, more dinner and I am sure there will be a cuddle session later with my roommate and bestest friend/ next door neighbor Samantha. What more can a girl ask for? So I suppose the purpose of this blog is just a reminder that I and no girl needs a boy to make a girl happy on this stupid holiday. Thank you friends for being so darn amazing.